


The Song of the Battle of Giant Crabs, or, a Mission Report by Thor Odinson

by iokheaira



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Bad Poetry, Gen, fornyrdislag, giant crabs, report
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-08
Updated: 2012-06-08
Packaged: 2017-11-07 07:35:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/428520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iokheaira/pseuds/iokheaira
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor writes a mission report; bad verse ensues</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Song of the Battle of Giant Crabs, or, a Mission Report by Thor Odinson

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Stark Guide™ to Mission Reports](https://archiveofourown.org/works/400257) by [coffeesuperhero](https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeesuperhero/pseuds/coffeesuperhero), [sabinelagrande](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sabinelagrande/pseuds/sabinelagrande). 



> Because Avengers are encouraged to use poetic alliteration in their reports:  
> [The Stark Guide™ to Mission Reports](http://archiveofourown.org/works/400257)  
> (my apologies for the errors in fornyrðislag)

So sing I, Thor,  
the shield-smasher's wielder  
to Son of Coul  
the collector of sagas  
and to his high lord  
the one-eyed Fury:

Terrible tidings  
did they tell us  
of dreadful deeds  
done by sea-dwellers  
shell-covered creatures  
craven crustaceans  
sent by a sorceress  
her foes to slaughter

Raging to rescue  
we rushed to the ruins  
The son of Odin  
smote with his foe-bane  
above, man of Iron  
harassed the enemy  
below fought with cunning  
America's Captain  
Smashed the green giant  
to ground pincer-bearers  
Yet two others  
took to the battle:  
the unerring archer  
arrows sent flying  
in shadows hidden  
stalked silent slayer

The clever Captain  
did the crabs corral  
with his shield-brother shepherded  
to fountain sea-creatures  
Then mighty Thor  
called in the thunder  
with swift bolts banished  
baleful monsters  
while Hawkeye harried  
with hail of death-staves  
the dread sorceress  
of her doom unknowing  
Yet doom approached  
the red death found her  
Wholly victorious  
was the Black Widow.

And so once again  
we emerged with glory  
Saving the city  
from sea-bane's slaughter.


End file.
